A beautiful 8 year old with relapsed-refractory leukemia was gleaming with happiness and joy. All she wanted to do was play. Princess’s (a nickname) mother was at the bedside, listening to a group prayer session, praying to God to help in this difficult time. She looked miserable as we had just explained that despite all our therapeutic attempts, Princess’s disease had come back with a vengeance. Sometimes I forget the reality that my patients go through when they look well, and the need to balance giving joy in the midst of a grim reality.

I often think back to a Dr. Who special, where he tells a mother who “lost” her husband (won’t spoil it for you), who is hesitant to celebrate a holiday,

“Because every time you see them happy you remember how sad they’re going to be. And it breaks your heart. Because what’s the point in them being happy now if they’re going to be sad later. The answer is, of course, because they are going to be sad later.”

Distraction play (yes I know thats technically not a valid term for an 8 year old, but it fits) worked well as playing with her helped her distract herself from the mouth ulcers and pain she had developed. I am grateful for the opportunity to help her in change in her pain medications.